Healing - Yet Another Begining

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©2016 TJ & Tamera Overman, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ReUse by permission only.

The stars represent app users who felt an aftershock

Yes, I have been neglecting the blog for a time and I feel pretty bad about it.  Things have been tough here for awhile now and it felt too much like a chore, this writing thing.  Perhaps I'm not being honest with you or myself if I do not fess up to what is probably a bit of depression.  There is still fear here and things are not back to normal.  They are not going to be for some time.  It is not that things are bad for us.  Not nearly as bad as they are for others anyway.  It is however, very hard for us to exist through a disaster and the aftermath especially considering our lack of language skills.

In Florida we had the tropical systems just like most of the Eastern Seaboard.  There is always stress during the season as this storm or that meanders through the Atlantic or Gulf of Mexico.  You have days to prepare.

As a matter of fact Florida is being warned about one now.  It is not even a storm yet.  That preparation causes stress too and generally, nothing ever comes of it.  One year we had three storms affect Jacksonville back to back.  This feels a little like that felt.  It is magnified by the surprise of terramotos; the lack of warning.  For us specifically it is magnified further because our family is so far away.

Rebuilding takes time

It is impossible to feel "normal".  We lost our city, Portoviejo which was a part of our routine.  Going to the markets and learning so much while there is really non-existent for us right now.   We can't get a lot of what we used to get from Portoviejo grocery stores.  So I guess we are now on a different learning curve.

We are in the winter months here which also means a lot of wind.  This is fantastic weather time where we need no air conditioning.

The wind makes noise though.  Sometimes when it rattles doors and windows I wake up thinking it is another aftershock.  Sometimes a car starting or a truck/bus simply driving by will put me on edge.  I do not know how many times I've looked at my wife or she at me asking, "Is it another one?".

A Crucita hotel has structural damage resulting in a red tag

Then there are the dreams.  Again, not horrifyingly destructive but each one takes a toll.  Sometimes sleep won't come.  I keep expecting another tremor or worse.  I dream about terramotos a few times a week now.  This is less than before indicating healing has begun but it is tougher than I ever imagined.  Sometimes I feel tremors even though there weren't any.  My wife is in the same boat.  So is everyone else.

Of course that includes the healing.

So.  It is time to get over the not writing thing.  Hopefully it will be somewhat cathartic.  I think it was just after the event.  I hope it will be now too.

Crucita is also healing.  The Government is here, inspecting buildings and designating them as unsafe to occupy, can be occupied but requiring work, or safe to occupy.  Red, yellow, and green.  As the buildings are inspected the corresponding sticker is placed on it with the official designation.  It is very good to see them working on it but also sad.  There are quite a few buildings here with red tags.  That means businesses that can't function and families without homes.

A Crucita restaurant with a green tag

For the latter, large tents have been erected in the the town square and other areas.  They were sent by the Chinese and are getting a lot of use.  For the former there is not much which can be done.  Many of the businesses are also the owner's homes adding insult to injury.  No one is sitting on their hands though.  They are making their way however they can.

The businesses that survived and there are many, are making money.

They are the only places to purchase everyday living necessities right now.  There has been no price gouging at all.  In fact when getting cash was so hard, prices were lowered by the vendors on the spot.  The people who need help most are getting it.  The people who can give help are giving it.

Workers gather for prayer on the Malecon prior to beginning inspections

The terramoto seems to have left the domestic dogs and cats just as they were before.  Our cats do not even flinch anymore when the aftershocks do come.  We can not get cat litter here so beach sand is our thing now.  Not fun I can tell you.  Also, cat food is not easy to find.  I never thought this could be a problem here but cats can not survive on tuna or even fresh fish alone.  You might be surprised to know that they prefer nasty dried food to fresh fish off the boat.

We make them their own special food and pepper it with the dry when we can get it.

We have bottled water again and that in and of itself is a morale booster.  There are good days and bad when it comes to our morale.  We are scared and I am glad my wife and I have each other.  Being alone in this would be insufferable.  Hopefully we will soon be at the point where there is more good than bad.  I say that not just for my wife and I, but for everyone in Ecuador.  For all of us it is another beginning.  Chao!

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Tamera's Take: Goodbye Yellow Brick Road, Cats, & Things Go Wrong Sometimes

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Tamera's Take is about being here.
Are you ready?  I am.

Listening to "Someone Saved My Life Tonight - by Elton John & Bernie Taupin".  I am listening to this song on Pandora Internet Radio.

Now you are saying to yourself, "I thought she could not listen to Pandora Internet Radio in Ecuador".  

You cannot.  But yet, I am.  More on that later.  Keep reading.

Madman Across the Water - North Crucita Beach

In 1973 the album Goodbye Yellow Brick Road was released.  I was in elementary school.  I fell in love with the song.  I fell in love with the album.  I joined the Elton John Fan Club.  My dad bought the 8-track for me so we could listen to it while riding in our red Chevy C-10 pick up truck.

I do not think my dad was a big fan of Elton John, but he loved music and he knew how much I loved Elton John. For some reason my dad hit the skip track button on more than a few songs.

Elton John-Goodbye Yellow Brick Road-Mercury Records

I would not understand this until much later. Who has not experienced that "ah-ha" moment as an adult.  A year after I got Goodbye Yellow Brick Road, my grandmother (Grammy) asked me what I wanted for my birthday.  I told her I wanted the Caribou album.  I was slightly disappointed when I unwrapped my present and in place of "Caribou" was "Greatest Hits".  Grammy later told me that she could not buy the other album because one of the songs had a bad word in the title.  I will let you figure out what song it was.

What is the point of all this?

Road Signs Are Not Always Familiar

The point is, that because I got Greatest Hits instead of Caribou, I was forced to hear something different and push the envelope a little into unfamiliar territory.  Some songs I liked, some I was not so crazy about.  But I DID get to hear them and make up my own mind.

I have blogged a lot about how swell everything is here. I have posted beautiful pictures to illustrate my point - and maybe to prove that I am not lying.

Friends and family back home keep asking, "do you still like it? is it everything you thought it would be? have the rose colored glasses come off yet?"

I can now honestly say that I never had them on.  At times I wish I had a pair. But that is not me. Never has been.  Never will be.

The remains of the stairs to the Malecon.

One of the reasons I came here was to get away from so many things back home.

To live my life.
To live my life.
To live my life!

There.  I have said it.  The cat is out of the bag.

No one is here to slap a piece of tape across my mouth. No one is here to call my husband on a Sunday morning and threaten him if he does not put a gag order on my comments. My comments.  My opinion. The ones that I was supposed to be entitled to as an American.

The sad part is that other people have so much control. The sadder part is that all that control was not real.  Oh it is real if you want to "be included".  It is real if you want to "fit in". Be told - who to like, what to say, where to go, when to be there.

Do not get me wrong.  We are not perfect.  However a person can only take so much pressure before the world turns at a different speed.  Life looks and feels gray.  It gets easier and easier to become someone you are not.

Goodbye Yellow Brick Road.

Yes we have alienated some friends back in the U.S.   Not intentionally.  It is just what happens.  If you are planning to move to a foreign country, be prepared.  Not everyone is going to understand your reasons.  Not everyone is going to be supportive.  Some people are going to forget about you (almost) completely.  But not everyone. That is the good part.  Your true friends will love and support you from afar.  No matter how far.  Those same friends will be there for you if things go all 6's and 7's and you have to abandon your dream, and move back home.

I hope that never happens, but if it does, I know who I can count on.  "They're coming in the morning with the truck to take me home."   In the meantime, maybe some fences can be mended.  I hope so.

Water Pump, Junk and Stuff

Speaking of mending and going all 6's and 7's...things go wrong sometimes - even in paradise.

There are good days and bad.

We have met a lot of people here in Crucita.  Some have become good friends.  Some are acquaintances with the potential of becoming good friends. Some at least know who we are, and now smile and say hello (along with a few other things in Spanish) when we see them.

We feel pretty good about all this.  It does take a bit of work.

For one thing, we are often lost in translation.  When someone says something to me and I have no idea what it was, I do my best to memorize the phrase and look it up as soon as I get home.  Then I make sure I write it down and use that phrase in the future.

Hey it works. As long as you can remember the phrase by the time you get home.

Our Spanish is getting good, but let's face it, we have a lot to learn.  The slang is killing me.  The accents from one town to the next is another nightmare.

A word of warning.  Be very sure what you are saying before you say it.  One misplaced word and you could find that you have just insulted one of your neighbors.

I think we have recently done just that.  We do not know exactly what we said or did but it is obvious that two of our neighbors, Eduardo and Flores, are not very happy with us right now.

We know when it happened.


We know it had something to do with either a fishing net or an invitation to dinner. Since they do not speak English, and our Spanish is not good enough yet, we have not been able to reconstruct the conversations in our heads to figure out what went wrong.

Something is not right here.

Luckily we have had problems with our water pump for a couple of weeks.  Luckily?  Yes.

Most houses have cisterns.  These are tanks that hold water to be used for the house.  Some cisterns are above ground, some cisterns are below ground.

The cisterns above ground are filled by a water truck that makes deliveries during the week.  The cisterns underground are filled through a city water system automatically.

The water is technically potable.  Where the problems come into play is the delivery system of the water.  Basically the underground pipes.  Crucita has been working (at least since we got here) to replace the underground water pipes and the above ground electrical system. All this work has caused a few days without water.  A few days without electricity.  But it is no different than back home.  Maintenance has to be done.  We have learned to handle the inconveniences.  We both have camping skills.  Not to mention a few hurricane experiences.

Anyway.  Back to the water pump.

One of our neighbors, Fernando, happens to be a musician AND a plumber.  Another bonus is that he Ecuadorian and speaks English. Because he is a musician, Fernando and my husband have already become friends.

Fernando is also going to be fixing our water pump on Monday.

This came about with a lot of negotiation between us, our friend Tamy (who is also the property manager), the landlord (who speaks no English), Fernando, and three previous attempts (by our landlord) to fix our water pump without success.

The landlord agreed to let Fernando fix the problem and let us deduct the cost from our rent.

It occurred to us last night that Fernando might be able to help us resolve the faux-pas that we created with our other neighbor, Eduardo.  Since Fernando is Ecuadorian and speaks English, we are going to ask him to go with Jason to meet with our neighbor to translate the conversations. I think it is best if the men handle this.

Cat identity disguised to protect the intelligent.

I hate to sound like a traitor to women, but I would hate more to disrespect traditions and customs.

We are in Ecuador.  Men are the head of the household.  Women are respected but their contributions to the family are different.

I am trying to do a lot of balancing lately. It seems a bit contradictory at times.  But I am doing it all with my eyes wide open and no rose colored glasses.

"I've finally decided my future lies, beyond the Yellow Brick Road."

The "CAT" says that if you buy a U.S. VPN for your laptop, you can access Pandora. Not to mention your bank accounts, IRS, etc.that are blocked by the servers.  It only costs about $40/year for the VPN.   Perfectly legal. 

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